Ok, it took a while. But we're hooked on Vine.

Hadn't really found a great reason to Vine until last night. And then it dawned on us... HOME RUNS! 

Behold... the magic of Vine: (Please note, Vine is pretty new to the embed game. What is below should be like mini 6 second movies. If they don't play, click HERE, HERE and HERE)

10 totally overblown snap observations from Opening Night @ Arizona Monday: 

1) Carlos Beltran is 35. We're sure about that? Wait until he gets a hint of these 40 degree nights in St. Louis and the Cardinals might just be better off with the very rare 2 man outfield and take their chances.

2) Top of the 6th. Down by three runs. Need to get base runners. Leadoff hitter is up... and swinging at the first pitch. 

Of course Al and Rick absolve Jon Jay before the ball is even in the first baseman's mitt. There's toeing the company line and then their is smothering it in Ricky Horton and eating it whole.

3) Yadier Molina doesn't look right real skinny. Good for him, but still.

4) The Stan Musial memorial sleeve patch is money. Looks awesome.

5) Adam Wainwright got paid to be the man. When you only get the ball every 5th day, you've got to make each of your 30ish starts count. On the second straight Opening Day, he didn't bring his best stuff.

In fact, the night was pretty brutal.

6.0 IP/ 11 H/ 4 ER/ 4.50 ERA plus one maybe/maybe not injury on a comebacker up the middle.

6) Not the best way to forget what an abortion the end of the 2012 was. 

7) Baserunning wasn't a part of the spring training program in Jupiter, looks like. Hapless was the word of the night.

On Monday October 22nd, 2012, 31.8% of St. Louis houses had their TV tuned to Game 7 of the NLCS. 

A huge rating, for sure. But in a baseball-crazy city 9 innings away from back-to-back pennants, the number on the surface seems low.

At least until you put yourself back in that dark space. Where the Cardinals were up 3-1 in the NLCS, at home and ready to pop bottles just 3 days prior. 

Then 32% seems silly for a whole other reason. 

By the thrid inning, it was 6-0 Giants (side: enjoy Kyle Lohse, Brewer fans!) and we knew a long, long winter was ahead. Tonight, around 9p St. Louis time, the healing begins. 

It's Opening Day.

And the Cardinals have a fresh 162 chances to help us all forget the last 3.

OPENING DAY ROSTER:

IF: Tony Cruz, Yadier Molina, Matt Adams, Matt Carpenter, Allen Craig, Daniel Descalso, Ryan Jackson, Pete Kozma, Ty Wigginton

OF: Carlos Beltran, Matt Holliday, Jon Jay, Shane Robinson

SP: Jaime Garcia, Lance Lynn, Shelby Miller, Adam Wainwright, Jake Westbrook

RP: Mitchell Boggs, Randy Choate, Joe Kelly, Edward Mujica, Trevor Rosenthal, Marc Rzepczynski, Fernando Salas

DL: Chris Carpenter (60-day/Season), Rafael Furcal (60-day/Seson), David Freese (15-day), Jason Motte (15-day)

It's Opening Day. Make sure the boss knows you'll be up late tonight celebrating. Winter sucked. Now it's over. Time to make the summer of 2013 memorable. 

U2. Dave Matthews. The Eagles. 

14-13 with a nearly 4 ERA and 1.24 WHIP gets you 97 million dollars? 

Jon Hamm.

It's good to be Jon Hamm.

That right there is the face of a guy who just had a story published in NY Magazine about how big his, ahem, "package he's carrying" really is. 

Seriously: LINK HERE

Of course he's wearing a Cardinals cap. Of course. 

I love spring!

And in St. Louis, we're going to have a spring sooner or later. But until then, feets of snow keep piling up on our lawns and shared public spaces. So we might as well make Cardinals snow art, right?

Friend of the the site @Dathan7 is back at it with a Chris Carpenter/Yadier Molina set piece. 

Enjoy...

By the way, Opening Day? Less than a week from now. Maybe we'll take a cue from US soccer and just play on? 

What's that? 

You want to check in on the Cards Diaspora BS Detector and see who the stunning mind that leads the pack after the first 2 rounds is? Well, OK. Let's do that.

Well, would you look at that. All alone in first place. 

I guess you really didn't want to know after all, did you? If it makes you feel any better, New Mexico is pretty much making sure that I won't end up winning the whole deal and one of you will indeed take home the big prize.

Also, Dunk City. 

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In the mid 90s, the Hooks' tried to do Spring Training. 

We went to St. Petersburg with grandma and grandpa and mom and dad and brother and got in part of a game. Then it started raining. And the rain turned into a hurricane. 

Highlights of the trip included: watching hotel staff throw everything they could find into the pool so it wouldn't blow away, driving in a rental van that had some windows blown out and seeing how far I could walk against the wind without getting blown backwards.

Several years later, it' s a memorable trip. Long story, short? I hadn't been to a Spring Training since then. So when the real job sent me to Phoenix for some business late last week, I had a little free time to take in my first real Spring Training game that didn't involve pending doom.

Seeing as I'm also a tremendous nerd, I took some pictures. So let's take a tour of the spring home of the AZ Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies: Salt River Fields @ Talking Stick.

Here's the entrance to the field. I'm going to warn you right now, this is going to be a PSA for this facility. It was pretty much everything you'd want from a baseball field. Every single thing was thought through.

Home to the Diamondbacks and Rockies, Talking Stick opened in 2011 and until next year, is the newest Spring Training field in the Cactus League. 

I'm writing this post in the middle of a snowstorm. They have no such problems in AZ. In fact, they have sunscreen stations at multiple locations in the outfield for pasty white Midwesterners like me.

Three things to note in this pic. 1) Laying in the grass, drinking beer on a 87 degree March day isn't a bad way to spend a Friday. These people seem to agree. 2) Yes, that girl and guy have their shirts off, as did many others. 3) I can't imagine the water bill at this place. That field was immaculate and green.

The view up the 1st base line. The walking concourses were really wide. So even when people stopped to watch some of the game, there never was a bottleneck. I'm thinking that the Busch Stadium designers wish they could re-do the section of restrooms by the Stan Musial entrance where foot traffic is always backed up...

Not bad seats. Yes, Hunter Pence looked crazy from this close too. (Not pitcured)

Guess I didn't realize the business that Spring Training has become. The stadium was packed for a split squad game. I name checked Pence above only because he was the 1 guy I actually recognized.

Heck. Yes. The Whiffle Ball stadium should be a part of every single new ballpark built. Period. Not nearly as nice as the one at Petco Park in San Diego, but still, pretty sweet. 

So they had these viewing decks in the outfield. Inside were stores and gift shops, but on top of them, were some pretty awesome views of the field.

And to wrap this up, here's my stab at art. And by that I mean, I didn't see that there was a big stick in front of me, until I took this picture.

Grade? A

If you're headed out from Downtown Phoenix, be warned. Everyone claims that everything is 20-25 minutes from downtown, regardless of how far away it is. This is a good 35-40 minutes away from downtown.

Let me preface all of this by saying I love Chris Carpenter. Like, quite a bit. 

I think that he's one of the very rare players that are not only popular during their tenure, but will only gain popularity as time moves on. 

Bob Gibson. Willie McGee. Stan Musial. These greats were loved in St. Louis as they played and are more beloved today. Chris Carpenter will be one of those guys. He gets the city, the team, the fans.

So, just what in the hell is he doing?

Yesterday, Carp showed up at Spring Training. The media was a bit caught off-guard, but his presence was a welcome diversion from the pitter patter of daily camp activity. 

On Feb 5th it was announced that Carpenter would miss the 2013 season because of arm and neck troubles. GM John Mozeliak was asked if he envisioned the pitcher returning and he said "Do I envision Carp returning? I would say it's very unlikely, so, no."

Carpenter didn't retire at that news conference.

Us more cynical of the situation wondered why he would, since retiring would leave 12.5 million dollars on the table. As long as Carp went through Cardinal approved rehab, he would collect his money. I'm not going to say I wouldn't do the same thing... but the refusal to throw in the towel left a crack in the door for his return at some point.

A month later, Carp is talking. And here's what he told the Washington Post:

"I'm not going to have surgery anymore. We'll see what happens. I don't see it. With the things that are going on in the times of every day life, I just don't see it getting better to be honest with you." Asked if he wants to continue pitching: "I do, I just don't think I can."

So this is the retirement?

Again, no. 

Carpenter seems to be having a hard time letting go. And for a guy that lived and died with games he started, I'm not surprised. But just like when Sean told Lindsay that he loved her while dumping her... this was an ill-fated public appearance.

Chris: get your money. Get every dollar of it. But if you're going to do it this way, then stop talking to the media.

You can't go in front of a bunch of reporters and tell them that you don't think you're ever going to pitch again, but not retire. Either you're going to make a run at it one last time or you're not.

Enough of being in the middle.

Trust me, we want to get on with celebrating your career as a Cardinal. And we can do it ASAP or we can wait until you make it official after the season. Either way is good. But it's not in anyone's best interest to muddy the waters. And then do it again.

Chris Carpenter has been great at reading St. Louis. But it looks as if he might need some cheaters to see his media work is missing the mark.