Cards Diaspora - A St. Louis Cardinals Blog
Monday, March 5th is the first Cardinals pre-season game...
Billy Cundiff is a goat. Kyle Williams is infamous. And there is a big difference. Missing a short field goal late in a game happens. It stings for Ravens fans. But Kyle Williams will forever be the subject of every bar slash buddy slash workplace 49er conversation for as long time goes on. It'll get better if the Niners win a championship in the next couple of years. But Kyle Williams' name will be fashioned in a variety of uses. Scorn, agitation, deification (for Giant fans, at least), etc. al. I don't think he planned on being infamous when he woke up. Now he's in the Montana/Rice/Lott pantheon. Only exactly opposite...
I've seen many Tweets and FB posts saying people aren't interested in seeing a NY v BOS Super Bowl. It's the NFL. It's the Super Bowl. You're going to be interested, friends. And the ratings will prove me right...
Cardinal writer and friend of the site Christine Coleman came strong with a piece about Yadier Molina and his second straight year of jogging off the Winter Warm Up. Read the GMs comments. It's looking like we're headed for Pujols Negotiations Rd II. It's eerie how similar things are starting to play out. Sounds like the Cardinals are willing to let him get to free agent status before making an offer...
The cheapest roundtrip ticket from STL to London the weekend that the Rams play the Patriots in Wembley Stadium? $1,060. Yup. Good for St. Louis, right Rams?...
The journalistic ethics in sports have been more blurred than ever since the advent of blogs and Twitter and the networks practice of hiring former jocks in various roles. But I'm a little confused on how Teddy Bruschi can sit next to New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft, embrace him when the Pats clinch the AFC Championship and then go on to work as the guy who's giving me analysis about the upcoming Super Bowl for ESPN. I get he played for the Pats and has relationships with the team. I also get that everyone has a little bias. Damn this is out in the open now, right?...
Maybe I thought Moneyball was going to be an awful movie. It sounds like one on paper. But it was a damn good movie. Maybe Billy Beane is a cool MFer in real life, but this flick didn't do anything but push his stock way higher in life. I'd now feel comfortable having Brad Bit depict me in my life's big screen opus...
If you're interested in the Murray State All Access feature on ESPN's College Game Day from this past weekend, you can watch it: LINK HERE...
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After a long hiatus, the Friday Links are back.
And since we don't have anything better to write about in the middle of January, how about some extended commentary on these finds?
Trolling on Facebook the other day, I came across Justin Boyd (from InsideSTL.com fame) and his link to inappropriate woo'ing from Saved By The Bell. The genius, and I don't use that word lightly, that put this together deserves an award. It's one of the few memes that actually builds to a crescendo. In fact, I'm pretty sure that last clip isn't from SBTB at all, but rather a bizzaro world where SBTB and Full House mated... albeit forceably. LINK HERE
The 'Shit Girls Say' meme has caught fire the past couple of weeks. If you haven't seen the original (LINK HERE) it's pretty funny. But it's spawned literally thousands of other 'Shit (XXX) Say' videos to pop up all over the place. Friend of the site Bill Ivie (i70 Baseball) brought it full circle with 'Shit Baseball Players Say'. LINK HERE
Rebecca Black is one thing. Terrible song, terrible video, but pretty much exactly whats going through the head of any given 14 year old girl. This girl on the other hand is 8. I'm not sure when I was exposed to speed metal, but it was probably not 8. And if it was, I don't think I liked it. Now this girl is getting famous overnight for making a metal video about her fish tank and whatnot. We've got to start making people take a test to have kids. LINK HERE
Why not. LINK HERE
I love how Alec Trebeck can barely hold back the laughter after this contestant makes his question. He's probably much cooler than we give him credit for. Also, nice work contestant. LINK HERE
Maybe it's just me. But I bet there is some seriously freaky shit in the ocean that we haven't even discovered yet. How awful would be be to be stranded in a dinghy out on the ocean at night and have no idea what was going to come from underneath and eat you. Here's 12 things that will terrify you from the ocean. LINK HERE
No context. No description on the video. No decipherable purpose. Just a chick twirling a samurai while an elderly lady and dog watch and Swedish House Mafia plays on a boom box until a bro shows up and some synchronized dancing starts. LINK HERE
You know where daddy is, lady. You know exactly where he is. LINK HERE
We'd like to wish a very special Happy Birthday to loyal CD reader Paul from Edwardsville, AKA Fresh Sr.
You, sir, are a gentleman and a scholar.
That's it. That's the week. It's been a productive one. And how about those St. Louis Blues people. They're OK.
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Could 2012 be a historic year for your buddies at Cards Diaspora, well before the Cardinals even hit the field for Spring Training?
I think most of our readers have heard of the Riverfront Times, and have probably seen their many "Best of STL" editions. One of their more recent features is the RFT Web Awards, which are a great way to learn about St. Louis blogs, people, products and places that you might miss on your daily routine around the internet. And while we appreciate our readers keeping us abreast (wink) of the best porn clips in the universe, local non-porn blogs need your support too.
We're all sports junkies here, so the "Best Sports Blog" nominees are intriguing because there might be a new site out there to check out, or if it's a friend-of-the-site, we can deliver a cyber pat on the back to congratulate them on the job well done. So to our surprise, yesterday we scrolled down and saw this:
Three legit powerhouse local blogs...and us. Somebody made a terrible, terrible mistake and they don't feel like breaking the bad news about accidentally including the CD.
If you're asking, "Did Hooks take all the ad revenue from those Tampax ads on the sidebar, and bribe the RFT judges?", well the answer is yes. Seriously, every other time I look, there's a Tampax ad over there to the right. We are ganksta ballin' with this Tampax money rolling in. Sure, I'll stop...
I think it goes without saying, but we're completely flattered to be included in that group. There are a LOT of outstanding local blogs that should have been mentioned before us (St. Louis Game Time and Turf Show Times immediately come to mind. The various sections of InsideSTL are pretty good. SB Nation St. Louis is another. And there are countless Cardinal blogs that I could mention; we really get smoked in those Best Cardinal Blog awards.) If you're a fan of reading anything sports-related on the internet, you should spend a little bit every day reading these sites. We honestly have it good when it comes to fans writing about St. Louis teams. And no matter the sport, the trail of credit always leads to Jack Buck. I say that with all sincerity.
The good news for you is that it's not a popularity contest or anything, so we don't have to beg for votes or even "kindly suggest" you click somewhere, create an account, register for a newsletter and maybe cast a ballot if you still have a functional computer after punching a hole through the 13th pop-up ad. But if you want to give bacon or sex to any of the judges, feel free.
The groundwork for Cards Diaspora was set by RVB, and we've done our best to continue his efforts. Many thanks (and apologies) go to him.
Hooks may not have said this about himself, but he truly works his ass off, making sure we have something posted every day. Usually a plan like that is a recipe for crap overload, but it's always a quality three to five minute read. Always. Thanks to Hooks for his leadership, and of course his fearless singing ability.
It's a pretty cool honor to be mentioned in this category, so thanks to the RFT. We don't mind a well-deserved distant fourth in that group.
And most importantly: Tampax. We couldn't have done it without you, Tampax.
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We were able to scrounge together 40 bucks and make it down to the Winter Warm-Up for a few hours on Saturday. There are many Cardinal blogs out there who produced stellar recaps, showing us up for the zillionth time:
-Our pal Erika at Cardinal Diamond Diaries was all over the place and posted tons of pics and video throughout the weekend.
-Our pals at I70 Baseball had the event covered top to bottom as well.
-And our pals at JoeSportsFan have posted a couple pieces so far, and I'm sure they'll kill it with a fan-hunting gallery that will surely make you happy that you weren't seen with those people.
Everyone else is NOT our pal. Okay, we just haven't gotten around to reading them yet.
And hey, how the hell did other sites get media access? Besides the fact that we're lazy and we sleep 'til noon on the weekends.
So what do we have to contribute? Let's just say when we saw a dealer selling home, road AND alternate Pujols Angels jerseys, we knew how to handle the situation:
(Photo via @B97Matt)
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It's week 3 of The Bachelor: Winemaker.
Last week our protagonist strayed far, far from his comfort zone and took the harem to... Sonoma. This week he's getting real crazy and going to... his hometown of San Francisco. Here's hoping for a Merton Hanks cameo.
Let's Date...
7:03 - No. Actually your sister would hate The Model. With every fiber of her being.
7:05 - "This will be a very funny story to tell later on in life." And with that, The Winemaker's sister has written the epitaph for every Bachelor season in the history of The Bachelor. Well played.
7:14 - Learn from Doc's mistakes. Never, ever list your real fears to The Bachelor Producers. They'll use that shit against you in ways that you don't want to know. I proabably would have left the show if you asked me to climb a bridge.
7:22 - Online Dating Fail = signing up and getting sent your brother as your match. Ouch.
7:35 - Leap List. Is this a real thing? Oh, what's that you say? It's a clever marketing stunt by Honda? Of course it is. When you're a cynical asshole and word comes up four times without prompting, your radar goes up. Those Hondas the girls drove to the slopes weren't an accident. Because Honda bought a Super Bowl spot for their new campaign... called Leap List.
7:47 - A girl left. I'm not 100% convinced she was actually on the show. But she left.
8:00 - Hey big, big news Matt, we've got you a gig booked on national TV!!! No, no - it's not Letterman. You'll actually be on The Bachelor. And we're going to need to you play in a vacant city hall. For two terribly coordinated white people dancing in the atrium. With flashlights. (Also, second week in a row at City Hall. I smell a fetish.)
8:16 - THE FIRST L BOMB of 2012! We're barely half way into Episode 3 and we've got an L BOMB. A new record!
8:18 - Shawntel. Is. Back. The mystery player has been revealed and it's America's favorite funeral director. The Womack buried their relationship on The Bachelor circa 2011, but love doesn't die easy. It's been resurrected. Sorry.
8:21 - JFK had a secret room he took Marylin Monroe? Pimp.
8:32 - "Dumpster Trash". "Brad's Leftovers". "Thick Thighs". The Winemaker was right, the other girls are being really welcoming.
8:44 - The Model has her bluff called. A security intervention will probably be needed to get her off the set. She's like a Transformer for sterotypes. When the all come together they assemble something more than, ahem, meets the eye.
8:50 - Orange Juice? Orange Juice! Exactly what's needed when you're passing out. And make sure it doesn't have any fucking pulp!
8:53 - Ben has decided not to administer a final rose tonight. Vanquishing Shawntel, the fainter and tears for fears in one fell swoop. That's ripe move there, Winemaker. One only a well aged man might make.
Next Week:
What are you laughing at? YOU.
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“All I'm saying is simply this, that all life is interrelated, that somehow we're caught in an inescapable network of mutuality tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly affects all indirectly. For some strange reason, I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. You can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was one of America's finest citizens. He spent his life fighting for those who's voices had never been heard. Dr. King dreamed of an America where all people were given access to the freedoms guaranteed by the Constitution. King refused to stand down to oppression. His life is a constant reminder that America is a place where good men can fight injustice and dedicate their lives to others.
Please use your day off to consider his example and reflect on your own contribution to the world.
no commentsYou've heard it a million times: 'Baseball isn't America's pastime anymore'.
It's a completely arbitrary sports talk radio topic and it's probably true. The NFL has surpassed about everything as the standard bearer for entertainment in America. But that doesn't mean that baseball isn't as influential as ever.
During some recent time in the airport, I checked out Entertainment Weekly. I promise you that I had hours to kill and wouldn't normally read an interview with Andy Cohen, host of the popular Bravo TV series 'Watch What Happens Live'... but I was going cover to cover. And for those that don't know about WWHL, it's described by Wikipedia as the "first openly gay latenight TV show".
The show is moving to a nightly time slot after being a weekly show since it's inception. And the host listed his dream panel: Michelle Obama, Madonna and... DAVID FREESE?
David's been making the rounds like a maniac this off-season, most recently showing up for the Mizzou Vs Texas basketball game on Saturday. He's been everywhere, from talk shows like Leno to, literally, furniture store promotions.
Good for Freese. Dude is taking advantage of the situation. I'd do the same.
Baseball may not be as popular as it used to be. But let one David Freese prove that it's not anywhere near irrelevant. And here's to Andy. I too would like to see #23 hold court with the First Lady and the Material Girl.
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Animals need to be saved, people.
Tony LaRussa saves animals. This has been well documented the past 16 years, highlighted by the 'Smooch Your Pooch' shirt he wore during the 2006 World Series celebration, eschewing traditional championship garb.
For the past 6 years, Mr. LaRussa has used the off-season to put on a star-studded event for ARF, the Animal Rescue Foundation in which he's heavily involved. Big names. Big show. Big Bucks.
Animals saved.
This years event has just announced their line-up... it's almost as exciting as the March Madness bracket reveal. Let's see who's coming to St. Louis to light up the newly opened Peabody Opera House!
Ok... Now let's announce the 'Stars' To The Rescue.Wait, that's it? That's the list? Ton Johnston? Luke Bryan? Timothy B. Schmit? Annnnnnnd? Oh, you're serious. I'm being honest when I say that Matt Sebek might actually have more juice than any of those three guys.
I get it. He's retired now. And is transitioning into historical icon as opposed to a make or break power broker. But Ton Fucking Johnston? He's retired, not dead.
Don't get me wrong, this isn't a shot at LaRussa. I think he does a hell of a job with ARF and is working on a serious cause here. But I am calling for some 'Stars' to actually show up to this event so the people buying tickets don't have to tell their friends and family they're going to the big Ton Johnston show.
Oooof.
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Sometimes I have to travel for work.
Because I live in St. Louis and it's called 'The Gateway to the West' by people who like calling cities by nicknames, most of the travel I do is out west. After a nice dinner with some co-workers I called my mom when I was walking home. I noticed it was a little after 7 and was hoping that the Blues game against Montreal would be on NBC Sports when I got back to the hotel.
"You see the Blues won 3-0" she asks.
Dammit. It's already 10:30 on the east coast. The game has been over for an hour. And this is the life of a West Coast sports fan. By the time you're done with work, had a little supper and got yourself ready to watch a game, 3/4 of them are over.
Mom made a good point too. She said the NY media wouldn't pay a bit of attention to Pujols after opening day. It's too late to stay up to see what he's doing. Hmmm... now that I think about it, I can't tell you much about anything that happened with the Angels last year. I know they were a pretty good team and didn't totally roll over and let Texas take the AL West. I know they had a couple good pitchers. Beyond that?
Hmm...
I mean I like a couple of shows, but for the most part, I watch sports. Really I don't care what it is either, if it's a competition, then I'm in. But after the hundreds of hours I committed to sports in 2011, I don't know if more than a couple SportsCenter morning highlights were the extent of my Angels experience last year.
Pujols will command a bit more attention. And it's not like if he goes on some sort of superhuman tear it won't get national run. But outside of the spectacular, west coast teams just don't get the coverage (and by coverage, I mean ESPN, SI, etc) that any other team would. Hell, I'm writing this and primetime is still on, you're in bed.
This isn't meant to be some deep post, rather an interesting point by my mom. Less people will give a shit about Albert Pujols in 2012 because less people are going to see Albert Pujols in 2012. He's headed to a major media market, but will probably get less press than ever before.
Just another one of those things that we'll never know if Pujols considered before he left.
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It's Week 2 of The Bachelor: Winemaker.
Last week the fastidiously floppy haired fermenter hosted 25 women at a cocktail party and shed 7 of them to get the gaggle down to 18. This week's Live Blog is coming to you from an undisclosed Sacramento CA hotel room. That tidbit has no bearing whatsoever with this post, but whatever.
Let's Date...
7:01 - The Winemaker is having a home game. He takes the ladies to Sonoma CA (AKA Wine Country) for a week of... hmm... romantic vineyard walk and talks? Grape feelings? I thought the only people that went to Sonoma were married or gay? Or both. People kept telling me that this was going to be a boring season, that The Winemaker wasn't ready to step up the drama. I think he's game. He's ready to mix it up. Prove me right, big boy. Prove me RIGHT!
7:02- Is this real life? Didn't see who dropped that, but Internet memes? Big plus. Big.
7:06 - "City Hall, right there." Oh, Christ.
7:17 - The date with Kacie B. continues. And it's going, well, its... painfully, fucking, normal. I'm not here to watch a damn Match.com infomercial. This is the girl from Clarksville TN, though. Ever been there? If you have then you're well aware that she's willing to do just about anything to get out of that raging dumpster fire of a city.
7:18 - Hey ladies... Dong shot! He was 2, but still, dong shot!
7:28 - If the kids want "sexy" you give them sexy. You don't give them The Sprinkler, dammit. Kids these days are much more advanced than we were in Jr. High. They probably had more sex than you did last week. So find a pole, use it and get into the audition. The Sprinkler? I'm offended.
7:32 - A "gingerbread hooker". Well played, kids. Well played.
7:39 - I'm calling bullshit on the kids writing a coherent play in which all the constructs of The Bachelor are effortlessly woven into the fabric of a hastily organized community theater play. And if i'm wrong, then get to living, because we're doomed as a society in about 20 years when these kids are running things.
7:47 - 34 is now a cougar? We're really walking that line back, eh?
7:50 - "How'd that taste coming out of your mouth?" TIMES 2! Ladies, you've learned a valuable lesson tonight, when you're a model, you're better than everyone else. And when you're better than everyone else, you get everything you want. That's it. That's the lesson.
7:57 - Serious question for the ladies out there: does The Winemaker look like a good kisser? I feel like he's doing it wrong, but I want to verify this.
8:11 - The Model busts out the old standby for the really hot girls... "no guys ask me out". For a while, I believed this. So I asked out every smoke show I saw for like 3 weeks. Turns out no guy does not include this guy.
8:19 - Oh Winemaker. He's practically finishing The Model's sentences to get the answers he wants. I dated an actor and it was... JUST SO EMPTY, RIGHT? I'm looking... TO SETTLE DOWN. HUH?? It's like this women bought the entry level hot girl handbook and is reading it from cue cards behind The Winemaker's head. But it still fucking works. It still... fucking... works.
8:24 - I'll admit, I usually don't see the commercials, but is this K-Y Intense thing for real? It says it's "scientifically proven to make a women's big moment, even bigger". Orgasm drops. Sold by the tube. Tested by science. Tell me again how this isn't the best selling product of all time.
8:31- Ashley is totally getting pwnd by The Cougar. Don't bitch to the girls, young won. Got to go mix it up. Oh, and the 'Stage 5 Clinger' zing? So 2006.
8:38 - The Blogger! took 88 minutes, but she's finally here to... throw her jacket on a burning candle. And admit she has a penis? Is she talking about a penis? Penis' don't make you act like this. They don't.
8:42 - Ashley says The Cougar would be something "fun to motorboat". This is fun. How much material is she going to lift from 'Wedding Crashers'? Maybe Owen Wilson is her brother? I hope she sticks around to see just how deep her fandom goes.
8:51- It's time for the axe man...
Who's Bounced? -- The BLOGGER! (Side: either the producers did the worst hatchet job ever on a cast member or this woman is delusional. One or the other, but to be so upset after getting dumped speaks strongly to the former.) Some other girl.
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