Congratulations to Yadier Molina, Rafael Furcal, Carlos Beltran and Lance Lynn for being named to the 2012 NL All-Star team. Here’s hoping that David Freese can get in on the last chance fan ballot and Matt Holliday is the one chosen to replace Matt Kemp, who is still battling injury. 

6 All –Stars! That’s S-I-C-K.

Unless you’re the Cardinals, and then 6 All-Stars is parlayed into a 41-38 record.

We’re not short of opinions on this site, but today I don’t know if we have one on the ASG selections. Honestly, I’m happy for the Cards players that have been selected. David Freese isn’t going to win the last-chance ballot, but he is getting some national run and that’s nice. Holliday, regardless of your opinion on him, is having an All-Star caliber season. So it’s not like Cardinal fans stuffed the ballot box for guys that don’t deserve to be in Kansas City.

On the other hand, just how the hell do you have 6 guys that could make an All-Star team and only get your record to 3 games over .500? Honestly… 6 All-Stars, with a combined VORP of 3? 0.5 per All-Star?

Do we blame it all on the bullpen? They’ve been brutal for stretches, sure. Or maybe it’s the run runs these guys go on padding the stats and not belying their actual value? I guess that’s a possibility.

Who do we blame? Matheny?

Forgive being the turd in the punchbowl, but doesn’t having 66% (maybe) of a starting baseball team on an All-Star team get us something better than this? You would think so.

It’s time. 

The Cardinals welcome 3 shitbag teams to Busch stadium for 10 games in 10 days. The Pirates, Rockies and Marlins are all reeling and all are about at their breaking point where they become sellers at the trade deadline and start “planning for the future” by calling up talented rookies, making exotic line-up decisions and otherwise doing the things teams do when they know the postseason is a pipedream.

On the other hand, the Cards are only 1 game over .500 at home this season. Which is not only very un-playoff like for any team, but totally out of the norm for the Cardinals the past two decades. They’re a team that does pretty good on the road, but thrives at home.

These next 10 games present 1/16 of the opportunity a team has in a season. And the Birds need to take 7-8 games to make up ground on the Reds. It’s going to be hotter than two rats humping in a wool sock pretty much this whole homestand. The boys need to bring it every night and start separating the NL Central wheat from the chaff.

I don’t even know what the hell that means, but they need to do it. Hard, I would assume.

It’s time to get after it men.

(SIDE INDULGANCE) You know how you’re a good recrutier? There are 30 teams in the NBA. There are 60 picks in the NBA Draft. There are 345 DI basketball schools. There are 1725 ‘starters’ on said college basketball teams. These numbers don’t include thousands of foreign hopefuls wanting to play in the NBA. Yet Coach Cal has all 5 starters AND a bench player drafted last night?

Just saying.

• Don't drive into a horse. LINK HERE
• Use the heat, my friends. LINK HERE
• That's one way to enhance a textbook. LINK HERE
• Looks like Toy Story 4 was discovered. LINK HERE
• Who else wants to shop here? LINK HERE
• How to hack a road sign. LINK HERE

The Cardinals put together 3 wins in a row for the first time since, like, 1987 over the weekend. Luckily we get to feast on these bottom feeders 6 times per season, ensuring 4-5 wins in interleague play.

Are the Cardinals back on track? Ready to push the Reds for the NL Central lead? Who the hell knows. A stiffer test awaits in Miami this week and we can reassess after that. But let’s not get cozy with the idea that this squad is anything more than some post riders until they push to at least 5 games over .500.

In the meantime (and in anticipation of a very feminine Bachlorette post tonight) let’s take a look at some pictures from the tryouts for the new St. Louis Saints franchise stating this year in the LFF.

Lingerie Football League. That's right, men. Ladies in sports bras tackling eachother.

PS: The original St. Louis Saints might not be too happy about all this. Has anyone gotten a comment from them: LINK HERE

Some observations, if we may:

It’s finally here people. 

Baseball season.

Like it or not, there is no more LeBron or Durant or Westbrook or Wade to talk about. Although, ESPN will surely spend millions reporting the most recent bowel movement of Osi Umenyiora, the actually football is still many months from now. If you want live sports, you’re getting baseball.

In St. Louis, this may or may not be a good thing.

GOOD: The Cardinals have 34 wins and are in the hunt for the NL Central title. They’ve been banged up, but get a big boost with the return of CF Jon Jay and 1B Matt Carpenter this weekend. They haven’t seemed to reach their potential yet, meaning there is room for improvement.

BAD: The Cardinals have 34 wins and are falling out of the race in the NL Central. They’ve been banged up, but P Chris Carpenter, P Jamie Garcia and 1B Lance Bermkman are out this weekend and for the forseeable future. They haven’t seemed to reach their potential yet, meaning that if it hasn’t happened by not, it probably won’t.

Again, the whole middle of the road thing from earlier in the week.

With the summer now cranking, it’s time the Cardinals decide to do the same. Piss poor hitting and questionable management have led the Cardinals into a deeper hole in June than we’d have expected. It’s time for someone to step up and go on a tear. It’s time for this team to actually get off the median and pick a lane. Up or down. Where are we headed fellas?

What I do know for sure is now we have the time to actually watch and pay attention closely.

Now, the Friday Links…

• Never dress like a Zebra. LINK HERE
• If you promise grapes, get the grapes. LINK HERE
• His job. He loves it. LINK HERE
• Oh, boy. LINK HERE
• The guy has a point. LINK HERE
• YouTube. Always YouTube. LINK HERE

Opening day 2012 was a slog. 

The annual STL holiday was one to forget as the Cardinals not only got their asses handed to them, but the city was soaked by rain, causing hours of delays to the eventual start. Any sort of carry-over from the magical 2011 post-season run was rebuffed by piss-poor baseball and Mother Nature.

The next morning I got a call from Coach Mac.

He had his work tickets and was going to entertain two clients. He needed someone to go with him to the game. And I’ll be honest, I didn’t really want to go. The drinking slash cold slash soaking from the day before had really taken its toll, but Mac wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

After all, it was ring day. And we got a replica of the real ones the Cardinals were getting. How the hell could I pass that up?

In 2007 I went to replica ring day and got what amounted to a fancy toy. The fake ring was plastic, bulky and worst of all… attached to a stand so you couldn’t even wear it. (Sadly, even though I was long out of college, I broke it off the stand so I could wear it.)

Maybe it was this fact that had drawn down expectations. Maybe it was the hangover. But I promise you that when I walked into Busch Stadium I wasn’t expecting much of a promo item.

I got the single best give-a-way the Cardinals, or any St. Louis sports team has ever done.

In fact, during the on-field real ring ceremony, Coach Mac and I started taking pictures of each other in the stands and texting them to out of town friends. When the rain delayed the game before the first pitch, we actually left the stadium and went home. The day wasn’t getting any better. We generally acted like 8 year olds.


So it comes as no surprise that when the team announced that they were having a SECOND ring night that tickets went almost instantly. (More surprisingly was the Cardinals willingness to buy 45K more rings. I’m sure they’re not more than 4 bucks when you buy in bulk. But that’s way, way more than the normal magnet or poster.) Now the price gouging on tickets to the next night has become news:

• KY3: LINK HERE
• KMOV: LINK HERE
• STLToday: LINK HERE

Let me just say this: It’s worth it. I still wear the thing around. And damn it, people want to call me a douche, but they can’t. IT LOOKS THAT REAL!

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for story time today.