You're in luck - due to us having too much fun over the weekend, we're going to be delivering a double dose of Cardinal Crap today. It's probably for the better, since these two crappy gifts tie together so well.
I'm sure it's been said before, but we don't keep track of what we write on here. We all kind of figure you'll read for a couple weeks, realize we suck, then move on. Thankfully there's always a crop of new, unknowing Cardinal fans that swing by and the process starts all over again.
That said, I'm pretty sure the Cardinals toaster was featured last year, so it's fitting that they go one step further and create...
The St. Louis Cardinals Panini Press:
Is there any surprise that this is sold on Sears.com (other than the fact that Sears has a website)? And does anyone else want to go in on my new business idea of selling overpriced Cardinal paninis on the corner of Shannon's after every game next year? Good, let's get rich.
Our next item is for those of you who decide to ditch the carbs from bread for one night and go for some meat.
And you're not truly a carnivorous Cardinals fan until you have your steak branded with an STL logo:
You know some hoosier will brand this on their bicep. And if you're the nurse that admits them into the ER, please send us a photo.