Local Badass Blogger Appears in Fancy Local Magazine

Do you like people knowing that you were at Whatever Wine Fest or a Party in Some Park?

Afraid to go to Northwest Plaza?

Can't afford a St. Louis Magazine subscription?

Hey, Alive Magazine is the magazine for you!

In their "Good Eats" issue, lots of high-profile St. Louisans shared their favorite foods to eat around town, including our very own athooks. One can only imagine the selection process it took to be a part of this, but I think an Alive Magazine appearance puts us neck and neck with Redbird Nation (last update: Feb. '05) in regards to Cardinal blogger importance. Look out TradeJasonMarquis.com, you motherfuckers are next!

So the question posed to Hooks is simple: What is your all-time favorite St. Louis dish?  Let's see what the boss had to say:

Hunk Pizza, eh? We're supposed to believe that's a real thing? I'm about to go check Urban Dictionary and search for this 'hunk pizza,' and...

Ohhh, that's what I thought it meant; had to make sure.

I don't think he wants me breaking a big story like this, but it's time that we tell you guys that we're releasing a Cards Diaspora porn that we made a while back, and calling it "Hunk Pizza." And now that the porn industry is shut down for a while, where else are you going to go for fresh porn?

Exactly.

Okay, maybe that paragraph is a little untrue. But for a brief second, I contemplated making an MS Paint of Hooks' porn debut (debut, right? right??) in "Hunk Pizza"...

Yeah, pretty scary. Of course I came to my senses and was like, "No, I will not MS Paint the cover art for 'Hunk Pizza,' featuring a naked Aaron Hooks!"

"No, I will not!"

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"Okay, maybe I will..."

(Click "Read More" unless you just ate, or if your work frowns on cartoon naked man-ass)

I'm sending this over to Vivid right now:

 Sorry.